Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Review: Kiss Me, I'm Single

Summary: Note: This is NOT a book for single women on how to find a man; it is a guide for women who want to find their truest selves and celebrate them. As the author of the daily meditation book for teenage girls, Be True to Yourself, Amanda Ford's message of fierce individuality and even stronger identity has grown up with her audience. In her new book Kiss Me, I'm Single, Ford exhorts single women not to get lost in the pressure to be in a relationship (single women's mantra: Any relationship will do!) and not to lose themselves in a relationship. The bottom line is that the most important relationship they can have is with themselves.

True love is an inside job and begins with you. It is a basic fact of life that in order to be truly happy and fulfilled with another person, you must be truly happy and fulfilled on your own first. A good relationship can enhance life for sure, but it cannot take what is just "okay" and turn in into perfect. In Kiss Me, I'm Single Amanda Ford urges readers: "Get off your derrieres and get to work on yourself. Go inward and be relentless in your search. Discover what is in you that you must do in order to bring joy into your own life."

Refreshingly honest, ruefully witty and wise, Ford has also dug deep down and done the work she recommends. From her soul-searching sojourn, Amanda Ford brings back news that will empower all young women: "Love has nothing to do with another person; it is a condition of your own heart." - conari press

When KISS ME, I'M SINGLE by Amanda Ford arrived in the mail, I thought it was definitely the cutest book I've ever seen. As you can see from the picture above, the book is totally "girly" with the pink, red and purple on the front cover (so it's pretty cute to start). The book arrived with an added bonus -- there was a burgundy tulle bow around the book with a pink button that read "Single." There was also Ms. Ford's pink business card with hearts, as well as a postcard promo for the book. It was just too adorable and I just wanted to read the book right away! When I opened the book, it was very eye-catching to someone who loves all things girly. The pages are filled with pinks and reds as well as stripes, polka dots and hearts -- TOO CUTE!

Let me preface this review by saying that I am not currently single, nor have I been for a long time. I have been with my husband for 18 1/2 years and married for 14 1/2 years of it. I actually questioned whether I would even be able to tell if this was a good book. After reading this book, I want to say that KISS ME, I'M SINGLE can be beneficial to any woman, not just the single ones.

The book is set up by chapters; however, it's not your typical self-help book. Each page is either a very short story, an anecdote, or just a few words of insight The book is a very quick read, but it is full of great lessons. I have a feeling that a woman could read this book again and again with a different interpretation of the stories each time. There also might be times where different stories resonate with the reader at different times of her life.

While the book does focus on single women, the author wants women to realize that their value is not based on the man they marry. Rather, all women have to find love in themselves. Ms. Ford is speaking from first-hand experience. She is very honest in this book about her failed marriage and the growing and maturation she has done as a result of it. Her words of advice (or should I say wisdom) are what every woman needs hear -- it's hard to believe that Ms. Ford is so young.

As a wife and mother of two, I wasn't sure that there would be a whole lot of things that are pertinent to my current life. There were actually many pages that I found myself noting as I read the book. One of my favorite pages said this, "Learning to be comfortable with being alone and all the silence associated with it not only allows you to know yourself, but it allows you to be available to those around you. Developing a relationship with quiet makes you a better listener, a better lover, a better friend, a better daughter, a better mother, a better woman." I don't know if that touches a nerve with anyone else, but I couldn't agree with her more. Unfortunately, I all to often find myself reading a book, or playing on my computer, or watching tv, or......I never just sit in silence and reflect.

One other page that really resonated with me said, "Could it be that "making it" means being grateful for this very moment in life? Could it be that the key to fulfillment is learning to live fully in the present instead of constantly contemplating the future? Could it be that happiness can only be found in this moment, that the elusive "there" for which we endlessly strive is actually here, in front of use, easily within reach?" Hmmmmmmmmmmm..........

I really enjoyed the final chapter of the book titled "Every Day She Did the Impossible ." Ms. Ford writes fondly of her mother and how she continued to survive through many trials and tribulations. Not only is the final chapter a beautiful tribute to her mother, but to the resilience and strength of women everywhere.

KISS ME, I'M SINGLE is an ideal book to give to one of your single girlfriends (especially is she's always looking for Mr. Right.) This book does a great job of explaining the importance of self-worth and loving yourself with or without a man. One word of advice: you might just want to take a little peak at it first before you give it away!

No comments: